I won’t lose my virginity to a man in a gas mask.

  Thomas blinks at the text message from Alice on his phone. ‘Just found your pornography. We need to talk.’ Fuck, he thinks, sensing trouble ahead. He’s tired. He’s been lecturing at the university all day and he has a pile of work on his desk, but he knows he has to leave it, go home and face the music.  Alice is his girlfriend, a pretty, innocent who moved into his apartment a year ago, because she had no money for rent and she was in awe of him. He met her at a party and adored her from the moment they started chatting. She’s a pretty English rose, slim with blond hair and a cute turned up nose. She’s very bright and witty too, but she’s an innocent. Thomas has been patient and understanding, taught her how to masturbate and to orgasm, and now she enjoys the sex they have and is more confident of herself and with her body. But she’s still a virgin, still terrified of being penetrated.  In contrast, Thomas is middle-aged and has had much experience of sex. He’s been bisexual

Dead Winner

It’s midday, the curtains are closed and Jamie is in his bedroom, at his desk, console in hand, fixated on the computer screen in front of him, his pale face lit by its bright flickering colours.  He’s skinny, twenty-two,  unemployed and still living at home with his mum and most of that is down to the fact that he spends far too much time indoors gaming. There’s a tap on the bedroom door and in walks his mate Ben, who is similar in age and build, and shares with Jamie an obsessive interest in computer games. Ben however has a job in a local factory and lives in an apartment half a mile away.  ‘Hi Jamie..’ Jamie hardly looks up.  Still glued to the screen.  ‘It’s stopped raining.  You want to go down to the pub?’ ‘OK. Let me finish this game. I have to die first…’ ‘What do you mean? ‘I have to get killed ten times and then I move to the next level.’ Ben pulls up a chair.  ‘So what are you playing?’ ‘It’s called Dead-Winner.  Had it for a week and I’m like hooked.  What y

Double Six

  I’ve been going out with this guy Rick for three weeks and already he’s starting to piss me off. He’s good-looking enough and he likes to throw his money about, but frankly he bores me rigid.  One night he drags me over to a posh apartment in Chelsea for dinner with his city-boy workmates. I really don’t want to go.  It’s obvious to me he just wants to show off his pretty new girlfriend.  The apartment is large and modern but tastelessly furnished.  Rick’s mates turn out to be just as thick as Rick. Mike is tubby and spotty and Sid is skinny geek. Not surprising they’re single.  Throughout the meal all they talk about is cars and house-prices, the flashy places they’ve been, the important people they’ve met. When it starts to really piss me off, I decide I can’t play the innocent pretty girlfriend a moment longer. So after the meal, I slip away to the bathroom for a line of charlie.  I text my old friend Raquel. The lucky bitch is at a party, having a great time, and I’m pissed of