Message From The President
My fellow countrymen. This photo of me going around the internet seems to be driving people CRAZY. I need to explain exactly what happened, so that we can end the speculation and the insinuations and move on to more important things. The fact is that what appears to be a naked man kneeling in front of me is not, I repeat NOT, a real naked man. That would be RIDICULOUS! In fact it is not even a human being. I know some of you might find this hard to believe, but in fact this is a visitor from another planet, which is why his skin-tone is very slightly green, though it’s almost impossible to make that out in the photo. I have not mentioned this before because this administration does not normally make public, our communications with alien beings, naturally because we do not want to cause alarm. But the fact of the matter is that they exist, and the one who was beside me in the photograph was a visitor from a planet way over on the other side of t...